The Juggle is Real: Back to Work Following a Parental Leave

What should you consider when returning to work after parental leave? It involves more than just logistics and can bring unexpected emotions and adjustments for the whole family

When parents return to work following full-time child-care, mixed emotions can often be anticipated. Some of us may feel a deep sadness, guilt, or confusion, while others may feel grateful or simply relieved to get back to work. Even trickier, is the realization that we may be experiencing some combination of all of these emotions. No matter how you are processing the transition, the change can be a sensitive period for the family, and we (the parent) may need just a little more support, too. Where we live (e.g., USA or Canada) can dictate parts of the transition, but that doesn’t mean that we don’t have personal agency and that we can’t make choices that work for each of us (and our families) to be more intentional as we enter this new phase of life.

Keep in mind these pointers for navigating the transition back to work:

In anticipating a new schedule, discuss roles, responsibilities and tasks with your partner or support system beforehand (if this applies). Schedule regular check-ins, as individual responsibilities may change as you learn more about what is working (and not working) for each of you.
Be patient with yourself and the rest of your family system. There is a learning curve, so it can take some time until families get used to a new rhythm.
Try to remain open and self-reflective in the face of change. Work may take on a different meaning for you, given that being a parent often comes with identity shifts. This is a new phase in life, with new and often competing priorities, and so that warrants extra care and patience for both you and your family system.
Book a meeting with your team to discuss expectations, contingency planning, and preparation. For example, how will you manage if your child needs to be picked up unexpectedly? Does your workplace offer supports or resources that could help?
If guilt, overwhelm, or any other experiences are getting in the way of enjoyment of work and/or parenting, make it a priority to attend to them therapeutically, whether that is with a mental health professional or with your trusted colleagues or support system.

Dr. Shira Yufe is a Clinical and Health Psychologist at Laksman Doell Psychology. She is interested in the intersection of our professional and personal lives, namely how work life can enhance or detract from one’s mental health. In addition to her clinical work, she lectures and provides talks in university and professional settings.