Talking With Your Teen About Mental Health

Conversations about mental health with teenagers can feel uncomfortable or intimidating, but avoiding them may leave teens feeling alone during a time when connection matters most.

Adolescence is a critical period for mental health and development, as many mental health disorders emerge with first onset during this stage of life. Teenagers also encounter many new and evolving challenges related to friendships, academic demands, dating, social media, transitioning to high school or university, and figuring out who they are as individuals. This makes it an especially important time to regularly tune in and check-in with your teen about how they’re doing.

As parents, it may feel daunting to initiate conversations about mental health when your child is having a hard time. Perhaps you worry about saying the wrong thing or upsetting your teen, or you’re concerned that having these conversations may inadvertently push them away. However, it’s important to recognize that these conversations are about creating a safe and nonjudgmental space where your teen feels seen, heard, and valued.

Here are some practical strategies to support you in having these difficult, yet crucial, conversations with your teen:

Be yourself: These conversations may feel unfamiliar, and it’s normal to feel nervous. Showing up authentically and sincerely can help to reduce the pressure for you and your teen, and also encourages openness and transparency between the two of you.

Listen to and ask them what they need: Reflective listening and offering validation show your teen that you’re present and engaged. Allowing for moments of silence can also be helpful if your teen needs time to gather their thoughts or process their emotions before sharing. It’s important to respond with compassion rather than criticism, even when the conversation feels uncomfortable.

Keep the focus on your teen: It’s important to keep in mind that this is not about pushing an agenda – but about listening to your teen, responding to their cues or questions, and offering space for them to share their experiences. It’s about making them feel less alone.

Continue the conversation: Conversations about mental health are more effective when they’re open and ongoing. Having regular check-ins can also help to build trust and comfort. For example, having family conversations at the dinner table, can provide a wonderful opening that encourages your teen to share. And while your teen may not always want to talk, it’s important to reassure them that you’ll be there whenever they’re ready.

Encourage professional help: If your teen is struggling, helping them to connect with a professional is an important step. For some teens, speaking with a psychologist may feel easier than talking to their parents. Collaborating with your teen to find the right therapist “fit” can also ensure that they feel safe and comfortable in seeking help.

Rachael Morgan is a Doctoral Associate at Laksman Doell Psychology, who is in the later stages of completing her PhD at McGill University. In her clinical work, Rachael has a passion for supporting young adults through transitional life stages. Through working with young adults and their loved ones, she strives to help individuals to enhance their autonomy and sense of empowerment, to reduce self-doubt, and to strengthen their psychological flexibility in order to navigate new and evolving challenges with greater confidence and ease.